Come on people! Let's be real!

Everybody's seen them.  Those flowery, swanky, vainglorious blogs about how perfect their life is, how wonderful their children are, and how amazing their day has been.  I've got two words for that. Puh-lease.  I have been a stay-at-home mom for almost 5 years.  From the beginning, I quickly learned that being a stay-at-home mom was not all soap operas and playdates.  I feel trapped in the interminable mountain of laundry, in the infinite overflow of dirty dishes, by the everlasting song of the purple dinosaur, and by the incessant whine of a tired and cranky child.  While there are moments that make me sigh with complete adoration for my children, those moments are few and far between. So, spare me the grandiose details of your so-called incredible life and let's get a good dose of reality.  Life is hard. And stressful.  We all know it.  Some of us are unwilling to admit it.  But, this is one tired mom who is ready to spill the beans about just how mediocre and mundane life with kids can be! 


I'm sure I have many, many examples from the past, but I have to start somewhere. So, let's start with today.....

I woke up today and my child's sheets were soaked. Again.  I just washed them yesterday.  And let me just interject here:  Bunkbeds are NOT easy to make. UGH!  So, off they come and into the washer. Again.  Then it was time for my daily argument about what my middle son was going to wear. I finally let him pick his own outfit and he comes out with a shirt I had slated for the Goodwill and a pair of shorts that are on the verge of being too little.  

I did manage to get a shower today.  I know a lot of moms can rejoice with me about that!  However, while I was getting ready for the day, one of my children managed to unload an entire box of baby wipes and spread them all out onto the living room floor.  I cleaned them all up and then ran the vacuum.  Within an hour a handful of goldfish crackers was dropped and smashed into the carpet of the same living room floor while I was in the kitchen cutting up chicken for tonight's dinner. 

Not long after that, my child's diaper leaked and before I realized it there was a big wet spot on the couch. Yay. :( I was, however, excited to serve lunch!  I had bought a box of the Kraft Macaroni and Cheese with the Toy Story 3 theme.  I thought for sure my kids would flip over it! Got their plates (and mine) all ready and brought them to the table.  Took the first bite.  Yuck!  Don't waste your money.  My kids wouldn't even eat it.  So, yeah, my exciting lunch choice was a bust. 

Nap time.  What's that?  My kids have started to phase out of naps.  So, there goes my hour and a half of peace during the day.  Instead, I got to listen to my kids complain about the apparent technical difficulties PBS Kids was having today as their favorite show was constantly interrupted by intermittent pauses and  a loud screeching sound.  Before I knew it, it was time to pick up my oldest son from school.  Guess who fell asleep in the car on the way there.  Why can't that happen at home? Ugh. 

The kids were W.I.L.D. while I finished preparing dinner.  Loud and wild, which didn't help my headache.  When I say wild, I mean somehow a full basket of folded laundry managed to get rolled down the stairs by one of the kids while the others jumped on the unfurled laundry like a giant pile of leaves. 

Speaking of dinner... my efforts were in vain (as usual) as none of my children touched it. Therefore, cleaning the kitchen after dinner feels very anti-climatic.  Husband gets home at 6:30pm.  My 12 hour shift is over! Almost.  Bedtime duty *technically* falls on him. But, somehow I usually end up helping to get teeth brushed or pajamas on.  And of course my kids have to stall by asking for "one more kiss" before settling down (which I secretly enjoy). 

Settling down is a near impossibilty for my kids. Hence, the bloody lip my oldest son came downstairs bearing after his brother kicked him in the mouth.  I think they are all finally asleep.  A little down time for me before bed.  I wonder what tomorrow has in store for me?